Should I Feel Guilty For Being Fat?

I read in a Norwegian newspaper the other day about self confidence and overweight. It said that more than 80% of women are unhappy with themselves and their bodies. Isn't that sad? Isn't it sad that we are wasting our lives on being unhappy? This one life we have and we are unhappy with a few kilos too much or a lot of kilos too much?

I've been plus size most of my grown up life, but I have probably never been bigger than I am now. That should probably mean that I shouldn't be more unhappy with myself than what I am now either. But why should I go around throwing away valuable time living my life in misery? And would I really be happier if I lost some weight? Should I feel ashamed to be bigger than the norm? And should I feel guilty for feeling good in my own big body? Should other people change their way of thinking or should I be forced into slimming down to avoid unpleasant episodes?

Let's take an example.

When I was on holiday in Berlin last week I walked around Berlin in shorts a whole day something that was a rather bizarre experience. I have never in my entire life been so stared at by so many people as I was this day. I was measured up and down and people were laughing and sticking their heads together talking about me. One person even said in German that I looked awful! The majority of the ones staring and talking were women. Women of all ages. Some men as well, but by far the majority was women. I did not expect this kind of behaviour and it made me think if being fat in seen different from country to country. And I think it is to some extent. I've done the same here in England without people looking at me like I have a dogs head attached to my body. I've never done it in my native Norway, but my guess would be that people there would react similar to people in Germany. I did some Googling and found this infographic from OECD's website that I thought was interesting.


My native Norway is far down on the list of obesity compared to for instance United Kingdom, so is Germany. Could it be that people in Norway and Germany are less used to seeing fat people in shorts? I think that this can have a little to do with it, but I think Norwegians and Germans are well educated and well travelled people that would have seen fat people in "skimpier" outfits before. I think it has more to do with the fact how people react with surprise or even fear when they see fat people that dare to go in shorts, bare their arms even if they are flabby or wearing a two piece swimwear that shows off your tummy. I think that so many people are used to seeing bigger people hiding in big t-shirts and leggings so when someone dare to show some thigh and bare arms it's such a surprise and we end up as acts on a freakshow. 




As you can see, I wasn't wearing the kind of "up your ass crack" shorts that no one looks good in no matter what size. I was wearing normal shorts with a normal t-shirt.

I'm all for living a healthy life and I try to eat healthier than I used to, but I have to admit I'm also quite lazy. I don't eat extreme quantities of food and I don't eat a tub of ice cream every night. The reason why I'm fat is because I love food and over time I've eaten good food too often and not been active enough. Simple as that. But should I be forced into feeling guilty of being like this? Isn't it most important that I'm happy with who I am and that I feel good about myself. It's not like I'm totally inactive either as I love to swim, and I am out and about travelling, and walking a lot so I do exercise. I've reflected a lot over this and I don't think that I would be any happier if I lost the weight as self confidence is something you can have even if you are fat and flabby. Being slim and toned doesn't equal a happy life. Just like having money in abundance makes you happy. You have to find the self confidence within yourself and that is what I have found. For the last 10 years I've been very happy with myself and my body image and I've done some amazing things that I never thought would be possible for someone of my size. I've been a nude model, I've been a catwalk model, I've been in magazines as a model, I've been in two blockbuster movies as extras and I have met some really inspirational people. All this has shaped me into the person I am today. Life is too short to go around waiting for the day you become a better version of yourself. You are more than good enough as you are. It's no shame to be fat, it's no shame to be different. If people doesn't like it that you are happy the way you are, it says a lot more about the problems they have got. Those problems might be more difficult to change than slimming down a few sizes.

Xxx 

2 comments

  1. Health is not an obligation nor is it an indicator of worth. You don't it to anyone to be anything other than what you want or who you are.

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  2. No, you shouldn't feel guilty. There's so much fascism these days to do with body size. There have always been fat people, but now it's sport for arseholes to try to make us feel guilty for existing in our bodies. It's nonsense. I'd sooner be fat than a prick any day of the week! xx

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